When you lose a child, it is not just the loss of the child as he or she is, but the loss of the future, of what could have been.  Every time I see a kid that is around the age that Colette would be, I wonder what she would look like. Would that blond hair of hers have continued to be almost white blonde like Mark’s was when he was young or a slightly darker shade of blonde that got lighter in the sun like mine? Would her long legs have made her into a flexible kid who wanted to be a gymnast? Or would her having long fingers meant that she was more attuned to a life sitting at a piano or with another instrument in her hands? Would she be talking up a storm now like her mom was or would she be more quiet and pensive like her dad?